International Institute of Manitas
Manitas™
Public notice
A fake instrument, taken seriously
Manitas photographs a person and decides what they have a knack for. It is wrong. That is the point — the fun is watching something be completely certain about nonsense.
How the reading works
- 01It names things it can actually see. Glasses, a collar, the angle of the photo.
- 02It chains those into conclusions no reasonable person would draw.
- 03It commits to a percentage, delivers a verdict, and stamps it.
A worked example
Bald · glasses · polo tucked into the trousers · an overly confident smile
- baldlower air resistance
- polo tucked inabove-average preparation
- confident smiledoes not ask for directions
🚗 Manitas for driving: 78% — “Drives well, but turns any 20-minute journey into an opportunity to test a shortcut.”
Your photograph
- It is shrunk on your own device before it goes anywhere.
- It is sent once, to be looked at, and is never written to a disk or a database. There is nothing to delete afterwards, because nothing is kept.
- Nobody, including us, can look at it later. If the person in the photo is not you, ask them first.
What it will not do
- It does not try to work out who you are.
- It says nothing about health, ethnicity, religion, sexuality, disability or politics — it is instructed to refuse, and to answer something harmless instead.
- It can be rude about your choices: your shirt, your pose, how you hold the camera. Never about things you did not choose.